Today the weather has been beautiful and the sun has beamed in through my hospital window. I opened the window and felt the slight breeze on my skin but that is the closest to outside I will get.
I’m not allowed outside at the moment. I’m just stuck inside the hospital and it’s getting to me today. I hate being poorly. The sunshine made me think of sitting in the garden, of going to the beach, of eating ice cream and having barbecues. I miss the social aspects of these, of spending good quality time with family and friends. Two years ago today I was on a beach with my best friend and I’d give anything to be back in that place today, not just location wise but mentally too.
The shining sun has made me realise today just how much life I’m missing out on. When it’s raining or dark or cold it’s easy to feel comfortable sat in bed in front of an iPad screen but on a day like today I just want to get out there and live. I want to see things, experience things, be with others. I don’t want this hospital life.